The Pre-Marriage Course
Want to prepare for your future together?
Why choose this course
The Pre-Marriage Course is an opportunity for you to invest in your relationship through five in person or online date nights created to help you to learn to communicate well, understand and appreciate your differences, and prepare for potential challenges.
- Relationship tools
Learn practical tools to help you invest in your relationship for a lasting marriage.
- Totally confidential
Enjoy private, intimate conversations as a couple giving you the space to engage openly and honestly throughout each session.
- In person or online
Choose to go through the course at a local venue in the company of other couples or online in the privacy of your own home.
- Insights from experts
Gain insights from interviews with leading psychologists, authors and psychosexual specialists.
- Tried and tested
The Marriage Course and The Pre-Marriage Course have been run in over 117 countries for over 1.5 million couples.
Who's it for?
Is the Pre-Marriage Course for us?
- The Pre-Marriage Course is for couples who are engaged, newlywed or exploring the idea of marriage.
- It is based on Christian principles but designed for couples with or without a Christian faith.
- It is for any couple looking to build strong, solid foundations for their future together.
In the introductory session, you will explore expectations inherited from family and upbringing; communication styles and effective communication; the importance of recognising and expressing your feelings; and some barriers to talking. You’ll also develop an awareness of bad listening habits versus the power of reflective listening. As a couple, you’ll discuss your backgrounds and communication styles and you’ll practice a listening exercise as demonstrated in the video.
Session 2 emphasises that conflict in marriage is to be expected as you adjust to your differences and unpacks the unhelpful approaches of the “rhino” and “hedgehog” for dealing with anger. Nicky and Sila look at recognising and accepting our differences in areas such as money management or family norms and share about the "10 o'clock rule". They look at five steps to help reach agreement as well as the importance of saying sorry and a practical three-step process for healing hurt.
This episode explores the benefits of the marriage commitment in terms of deep friendship and a strong family life, and the idea of an equal partnership with responsibilities divided up according to strengths. You’ll hear what it means to put each other’s needs above your own, looking at the marriage covenant and love that is deliberate and intentional, not just a feeling. You’ll also discuss two practical aspects of the marriage vows: dealing with finances and managing relationships with the wider family.
Nicky and Sila look at keeping love alive during the whole course of a marriage and the deliberate choice to do so. They unpack various tools such as a weekly date night (with no phones!) and using Gary Chapman’s “five love languages” (words of affirmation, gifts or presents, quality time, kind actions and physical touch). This episode also focusses on the importance of sex in marriage, giving practical advice for good sex that is us-oriented not me-oriented and addressing the devastating effects of porn.
Marriage provides us with one of life’s greatest opportunities and one of its greatest challenges. In the final session, you’ll learn four requirements for working together as a team in marriage: showing daily appreciation for each other; letting go of unrealistic expectations; being prepared to change; and recognising common overreactions. Nicky and Sila also discuss the importance of a couple’s values and priorities, and the roles of the more adventuring and more nurturing partner in the relationship.
What to expect
Here’s what you can look forward to from each session of The Pre-Marriage Course:
Eat together
At the start of each session, you will share a special meal together. This is an opportunity to unwind and connect, helping to create the romance and enjoyment of a date.
Watch an episode
Each engaging and enriching episode explores a different topic through real experiences, expert insights and relevant teaching, with breaks for conversations.
Talk privately
Through workbook prompts and questions, you will be invited to enjoy private, intimate conversations that help you to engage with honesty and openness throughout the session.
Learn from leading relationship experts
Meet your experts
Dr Roger Bretherton
Psychologist, Author and Lecturer
Dr Sue Johnson
Clinical Psychologist and Author
Rob Parsons
Founder of Care for the Family
Dra Mosun Dorgu
Consultant Psychiatrist
Dr John Kirkby CBE
Founder of Christians Against Poverty
Emma Waring
Psychosexual Specialist and Author
Dr Henry Nube
Psychologist and Author
Nicky Lee
Founder of The Marriage Course
Sila Lee
Founder of The Marriage Course
Dr Roger Bretherton
Psychologist, Author and Lecturer
Dr Sue Johnson
Clinical Psychologist and Author
Rob Parsons
Founder of Care for the Family
Dra Mosun Dorgu
Consultant Psychiatrist
Dr John Kirkby CBE
Founder of Christians Against Poverty
Emma Waring
Psychosexual Specialist and Author
Dr Henry Nube
Psychologist and Author
Nicky Lee
Founder of The Marriage Course
Sila Lee
Founder of The Marriage Course
Hear what our couples
have to say
Couples from Costa Rica, USA, and Colombia connected, and all were blessed
... by the content seen in the videos and in the course manual, reporting changes in their marital lives that were only possible through the Holy Spirit working in their hearts.
Manuel y Nancy León
Costa Rica
Frequently asked questions
Yes, in some countries, The Marriage Course and The Pre-Marriage Course have been translated into other languages. Please click HERE and use the Find a Course widget to see what courses are available in your region.
In most cases, The Marriage Course and The Pre-Marriage Course are free to attend, but some churches or organisations do charge a nominal fee to cover the meal and other running costs. As a guest, you may need to purchase your own Guest Journals.
The Marriage Course was created by Alpha International, which also runs Alpha courses around the world. Alpha is a multi-week series of sessions exploring the Christian faith. Each week, the session looks at a different question around faith and is designed to create conversation. Alpha is run all around the globe and everyone is welcome. It runs online, in cafés, churches, universities, homes—you name it! No two Alphas look the same, but they generally have three key things in common: hospitality, a talk and good conversation HERE for more information.
The Pre-Marriage Course consists of five consecutive sessions and is designed with the intention that guests attend one session per week.
There are seven sessions in The Couples Course, which discuss the following topics:
- Strengthening connection
- The art of communication
- Resolving conflict
- The power of forgiveness
- The impact of family
- Great sex
- Love in action
There are seven weekly sessions, and each session lasts approximately 1 hour and 40 minutes, including conversations between you as a couple.
If you're interested in obtaining these resources, please contact your respective office HERE
Even if you are not yet engaged, The Pre-Marriage Course can serve as a tool to work on your relationship and help you decide whether or not you are ready to get engaged and married.
If you’ve been cohabiting for more than two years and are not engaged or considering marriage, we recommend you try The Marriage Course. If you’ve been living together or married for less than a year and you are not aware of any major issues to address, it’s a great idea to attend The Pre-Marriage Course.
While The Marriage Course and The Pre-Marriage Course are based on Christian principles, they are designed for couples with or without a Christian faith. We would love any couple to feel welcome to attend whether or not they have a Christian faith or any religious faith at all. We are confident all couples will find the courses relevant and helpful for their relationship.
Both The Marriage Course and The Pre-Marriage Course have a similar structure, with the environment of a date night and an emphasis on private discussions for each couple. The key difference is that The Pre-Marriage Course is for engaged couples and those considering marriage, whereas we recommend The Marriage Course for couples who have been married for at least two years. The Pre-Marriage Course can also include a Couple Survey which each guest completes in advance of the course. Following the course they look at the results of their survey over a meal with a designated married "Support Couple".
The Couple Survey is an optional series of questions that you will complete before The Pre-Marriage Course begins. The purpose of the Couple Survey is to:
- Affirm areas of strength in your relationship
- Highlight any issues that you may need to discuss as a couple
- Help you to decide whether you are ready for marriage
- Give a realistic view of what makes a marriage work
You will not receive the results of your Couple Survey, as these will go to the Support Couple assigned to you. The link to your Couple Survey expires 60 days after the last Pre-Marriage Course session. Following the course, you will have a discussion with your designated Support Couple. The Couple Survey report will guide this conversation, affirming areas of strength in your relationship and highlighting issues for discussion.
Developed in 1996, The Marriage Course has been run in over 117 countries for over 1.5 million couples. It is a not-for-profit offering from Alpha International, and is run globally by many organisations.
Más información
Alpha International is a charity registered in England & Wales (no. 1086179) and in Scotland (no. SC042906) and a private company limited by guarantee and registered in England & Wales (no. 4157379). The registered office is at HTB Brompton Road SW7 1JA.
EN 
ES
We understood and acknowledged our mistakes. We felt transformed, grasped the meaning of marriage, and why marriage and family are important to God. We asked for forgiveness from each other, and the restoration of our marriage was wonderful.
Azucena y Roberto Mexico